what my daughter has taught me
from a super young age, i always knew what i wanted to be: a mother. of course i was obsessed with baby dolls, but it was deeper than that. i wanted to be everything to someone. i wanted someone to physically, emotionally & whole-heartedly need me. i wanted to give an unimaginable love to someone. don't get me wrong, i had an amazing upbringing. i wasn't a girl who needed to fill a void. but i was always told "you won't understand how much i love you until you have a baby".
she was so worth the wait.
my baby girl is 7 months old today. i have no idea where the time went, but i can honestly tell you, that i remember everyday since she has been on this earth. from the first weeks of breastfeeding, to today, wiggling around the house & shaking her head no when she doesn't like a new food. it's a ride that i hope to ride until my last breath.
i'm not sure if it's the fact that i retired from my 9-5, but i really feel like the world is in a rush. i wish more people had the blessing that i do, being home with their babies everyday, but being away from your kids for 40+ hours a week, you'd think you would appreciate the time you had with them a little more. yea yea, i know, i'm a stay at home mom. shut up, right? what do i know about real life?
i get all dressed up just to get puked on. i do my hair just to have it pulled, and puked in. i do my make-up, only to have sweet potatoes spit in my face. and guess what? then i have to run errands, cook dinner and go to doctor appointments. i sit at a red light, or in bumper to bumper traffic with a screaming baby in the backseat. still with puke in my hair & on my fancy leggings.
all my designer bags are packed away neatly in my closet. christmas comes more frequently than my trips to the hair salon. my "swing by for a drink" days are over. and i couldn't be happier.
my daughter has taught me to be in the moment, even if she is screaming. to enjoy every second, because before i know it, she will be walking down the aisle. my daughter has taught me that even with puke in my hair, that won't get washed out for at least 3 days, i am all that she needs. she doesn't care if i have a million things on my to-do list, she will want to be held for the entire day. she reminds me everyday, that just because i don't bring home a paycheck, i am irreplaceable.
she gives me life -- funny how that works, right?