life update

August 26, 2014


the last few weeks have been a blur. we have been getting so much stuff situated before we embark on a new chapter in our lives, and as any new stay at home mom will tell you -- there aren't enough hours in a day. my husband's work schedule puts him out of the house for pretty much the entire day/night, just making it home in time for mila's bedtime, which leaves me to run the show. 

i always imagined myself being home with my kids. i never wanted them in daycare being raised by other people, while i was at work - just to throw my money back into daycare. especially with my husband gone, i didn't want to be absent as well. 

but to be honest, i never imagined it being so challenging. your priorities change. your "socializing" time is pretty much shot to shit - phone calls are a thing of the past, texts only please. invitations to events go out the window too. people assume you are too busy, and even though you may be, you would have loved to have just been thought of - even if they knew you would decline. 

life changes. you are now taking care of a human being 24/7. you're on call every second, of everyday. they make the rules. if you have to pee, and they are crying. guess what? you're holding it. if you woke up at 5am and it is now 2pm and you still haven't eaten anything, guess what? tough shit.

but as impossible as it may sound, you don't care.

you are too busy playing peek-a-boo to realize everyone went out the night before & drank all night. you are giving kisses to fix tears. you are a human restaurant, a human burp cloth. you are too busy playing "horsey" to realize the 4 days worth of dishes in the sink. who cares anyways?!

your life finally doesn't revolve around nights out at the bar, or double tapping pictures on instagram (even though on some days, that will be your only form of human contact). your life has meaning. you suddenly don't give a shit if all your friends went out the night before & you just to happen to miss the invite. all the "i can't wait to meet the baby" texts, soon turn into "wow she is walking already?". you finally see people's true colors when your life goes beyond theirs.

i am not sure if this is a rant, or just how i realized the turn my life has made. i may not have an extra set of hands helping me, or someone to have an actual adult conversation with until 8 o'clock at night, but i wouldn't trade it for anything in the world. the smiles i get throughout the day are worth more than any paycheck or night out. the best thing in the world is being a mom. seriously. the best.

14 comments

  1. You don't want your kids in daycare being raised by other people? If that's not a judgmental and ignorant statement I don't know what is. You claim we all need to support each other and stop the mommy wars...can you say hypocrite?

    ReplyDelete
  2. I'm not sure hypocrite is the proper word, but either way, no. if you read the entire paragraph, which I am not sure you did - it says that with my husband gone the entire day, I don't want my child in daycare being raised by someone else & being absent as well. for OUR FAMILY, it doesn't make sense. the schools my children will be attending will be pulling a large amount of income out of our pockets, and for the moment, it's not worth it, not until the PRE K years at least. you do what works for your family and for US, me being out of the house for 40 hours a week while my husband is gone double that, to pay for someone else to watch my kid, just doesn't work.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. If it doesn't pay for your family to send your kid to daycare then that's what you say. Saying that you don't want other people raising your kid implies that working moms don't raise their kids. And hypocrite is the right word...you said you want to support other moms and stop the mommy wars but that comment is not at all supportive of working moms. And seriously you don't have time to pee if your kid is crying? Put her down and take 45 seconds to pee...get a grip.

      Delete
  3. no it's more you having too much time on your hands to try and decide how I spend my time? I worded my post the way I wanted to & I'm sorry if you think that fueled the fire for a "mommy war". maybe you should keep posting anonymously so people can't nitpick at you. I choose to share my life as a SAHM, maybe my blog isn't the best one for you to be reading with such a hateful heart. enjoy your fabulous day!

    ReplyDelete
  4. It doesn't matter if I post anonymously because you don't know me anyway therefore can't nitpick my choices. And I stumbled across your blog and found you to be quite sanctimonious so I had to point it out. You are obviously someone who thinks they are so important you have to write about your life on the Internet for everyone to read and tell you what a supermom you are. You don't have time to shower but you have time to blog about what a wonderful mommy you are.

    ReplyDelete
  5. thanks so much for you feedback, glad you've taken the time from your busy schedule to read about mine! luckily your negative opinions only make me want to continue this blogging journey even more! happy reading .. or not! :)

    ReplyDelete
  6. People are ignorant . You do what is going to make you happy and your family happy. That person is out to make you mad and unhappy for no reason. Your not being a hypocrite and everyone has their own opinion on things. She does not want to waste her money on someone else watching their child and all working mothers do not have to send their child to daycare if they have family members to help out. Anonymous your the one starting the war who cares if she has time to blog maybe she does it when the baby is sleeping. To me it seems like you don't have a child so you wouldn't understand all the work she puts in to make her baby and husband happy. Before you post on people's blogs think how it might hurt others because it is rude and disrespectful because gnicccc isn't here to make anybody feel bad about themselves. She is here to show people her views on things and if you don't like it don't comment or don't read her blogs.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Jennie thank you so much for the sweet words! I agree, I don't think this anonymous person even has kids, and if they do, I hope they teach them how to share their opinions without being hateful with their words. oh well, can't do anything other than wish them the best right?! :) thanks for taking the time to read girl!

      Delete
  7. +1 to everything anonymous said. And nothing she said was hateful. it was truthful. If you cannot handle being called out for being sanctimonious and hypocritical, then you shouldn't be a blogger. You'll need some thicker skin to post about your life on the internet. The world isn't puppies and rainbows. Not everyone is going to agree with you and blow smoke up your ass. And just like you have the right to post a blog about your life, everyone else has the right to comment on it, form opinions of varying nature, and disagree or call you out.

    Jennie spoke about thinking before one posts, because it could be hurtful. Maybe you should try that in your blog. Try to imagine yourself as a working mother, you stumble across a blog, and the writer talks about childcare and describes it as other people raising the kids. Hurtful isn't it? Whether someone works because they want to or because they have to - it's still hurtful.

    If the truth is that it doesn't pay for you to work because your paycheck would go to daycare and you wouldn't end up actually making money - then write that. There is nothing wrong with that. It's the case for many families. But don't get up on your pedestal and write that you don't want someone else raising your kids, and act like a sanctimonious judgmental ass and say that your dream was always to be a SAHM. (I believe you wrote that in another post). If your dream was to be a SAHM, fine - write that. But again - don't make judgmental remarks about daycare raising kids. they're not raising our kids. They are teaching our kids in addition to us teaching them. They are helping us care for them while we work.

    And seriously - I am really stuck on this - you have time to blog, but write about how there isn't enough time in the day to shower, pee, or eat? I don't get it...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. i pretty sure the only people who think I am "better than everyone" are those who are working moms, and if that's the case then my blog isn't the one to be reading. I won't apologize for sharing my days with those who care to read about it. if you don't agree, then read about my DIYs or recipes. and yes, I always wanted to be a SAHM, and I won't apoligize for that either. I grew up with both parents working their ass off, and then when I was in high school, I had a parent home. those were the best years for me, and I knew I wanted to do the same for my kids. no parent "is better than another" & if you think that's how I portray myself then you are sadly mistaken. I worked hard my whole life to make sure I would be able to stay home, as does my husband today. the post was written when my daughter was 2 months old. and as an exclusively nursing mom, yea you don't have time to pee or shower when you're doing it alone. i don't need to explain things in depth just because I share bits and pieces of my life. my skin is a thick as can be, especially being a SAHM. I love all feedback, good or bad, please keep it coming, as will my blog posts.

      Delete
    2. Good grief. I'm going to make this simple. Don't make statements like the one in this post saying daycares raise peoples kids. It implies working moms are less then SAHMs. It implies we don't raise our kids. It is offensive and rude and hurtful and ignorant. I am pretty sure that was the point anonymous was making and it was certainly my point. working moms struggle with this, it is HARD dropping your kid off and going to work for 40 hours a week, regardless of whether it is choice or necessity. So the last thing we need is to stumble upon a blog post making a statement like you made.

      Also, exclusively breastfeeding has nothing to do with whether you pee or not. i mean, did you not pee the entire time you breastfed? Come on with the dramatics. This might come as a surprise, but formula fed babies have to eat as much as breastfed babies and they don't hold the bottle themselves! i had a reflux baby who pretty much exclusively screamed for the first several months of her life, but I managed to go pee. There is an old saying- "when you gotta go- you gotta go!"

      Oh and just for the record- no one is telling you to apologize for wanting to be a SAHM. But you contradict yourself- you say you want to. But you also say it doesn't pay for you to work. which implies you want to work but can't. Whichever it is- own it. But do so without making remarks like the above about daycare.

      Delete
  8. It's a good thing I use daycare and don't have to raise my own kids.... Heaven knows how they would turn out!!!

    ReplyDelete
  9. thanks so much for all the fabulous feedback! if you guys have a blog of your own, I would love for you to link it below so we could all learn how to be supermoms like yourselves! and if you don't, I suggest you start one because your opinions are flowing! TGIF!

    ReplyDelete
  10. Lol this is like talking to a wall. I give up.

    No I don't have a blog, I don't have time because I work and then I come home and do all the same shit as every other mother on the planet- take care of kids, clean the house, do laundry, etc. I've already wasted too much of my precious time trying to help you understand why your words were offensive.

    ReplyDelete

© tattoos + fairytales. Design by FCD.